Do you strive for perfection? Feel disappointed no matter how well you do? Maybe you expect too much of others? If this is you… you are not alone. According to our TONE member poll, we hit a hot button -- 100% hold themselves to unrealistic or unattainable standards. In fact, perfectionistic tendencies have increased substantially among young people over the last 30 years.
Perfectionism can be defined as a personality trait characterized by a rigid pursuit for flawlessness - often riddled by self-criticism and a concern about the opinions of others. Where perfectionism becomes damaging is when one believes their self-worth is tied to their achievements and is often linked to anxiety, depression and other mental illnesses.
If you struggle with perfectionism, here are four ways to start letting go:
Strive for excellence rather than perfection
It’s important to recognize the difference between perfection and excellence. One who strives for perfection leaves no room for mistakes - a standard which stagnates growth. On the other hand, when you strive for excellence you hold yourself to a high standard while still leaving room for feedback and opportunity.
Replace self-critique with positive self-talk
Your internal dialogue influences your behavior and self-perception. Avoid negative self-talk and replace it with self-care. Think about how you would talk to others who may be struggling and treat yourself with the same compassion and kindness.
Steer clear of the comparison trap
We all have unique strengths and abilities. When you start falling into the comparison trap, try focusing on your achievements. With a little help, you can train yourself to snap back to reality. As the old saying goes, comparison is the thief of joy. Recognizing your triggers and adjusting your behavior can go a long way to boosting your overall happiness and self-confidence.
TIP: The next time you find yourself doom scrolling social media, try redirecting that same energy into your personal growth!
Practice loving yourself
It’s time to start embracing YOU - the positive, negative and all the quirks that make you so great! Show yourself a little compassion for the things you cannot change, lean into your strengths and abilities and surround yourself with people who lift you up.
Missed the livestream event? For more from Executive Coach and Speaker, Kim Martin, catch the session on-demand.
Resources
Check out Kim’s blog to learn to unlock your potential and advance your life and career.
Read: The Perfectionists Guide to Losing Control by Catherine Morgan Schafler
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